Dating nightmares and other weird or dangerous situations can be prevented by trusting survival instincts you were born with, your gut feelings. Many women go down Dating Nightmare Boulevard because instead of picking someone to date, they just date whoever picks them. I ignored bad gut feelings prior to dating two men several years apart. One of them raped me and I ended up in a domestic violence relationship with the other one for two and a half years, narrowly escaping with my life. Let me share what I've learned about gut feelings with regard to dating so you can be safer than I was. These tips to avoid dating nightmares are simple but not always easy:
- Healthy Self-Esteem
- Trust Your Gut Feelings
- Personal Boundaries
Part 2 - Trust Your Gut Feelings
You have good or bad gut feelings about every person, place and situation in your life. The terms, "I had a feeling, " and "I just couldn't put my finger on it, " are all about gut feelings. Housed in our stomach or solar plexus area (hence the term “gut feelings"), our emotional center, they warn us of danger and give us warm, fuzzy feelings if things are safe.
When people cross their arms in front of their chest to look tough, they are actually feeling vulnerable and protecting their emotional center. Next time, they won't look so tough to you, will they? Challenge someone on something and see how long it takes them to cross their arms.
Fine-Tuning Gut Feelings
Who you should and should not date will be extremely clear as you fine-tune your gut feelings. Pay attention to how you feel when you speak with someone, go somewhere, experience something. Notice if your stomach area feels tight, relaxed, tense, upset or warm and fuzzy. You don't necessarily have to follow all of them but when you feel a particularly strong gut feeling, you'll know the importance of taking it seriously. As you acknowledge these feelings, you'll be much better at reading people and knowing if they are a good fit for you while avoiding dating nightmares.
Dating & Gut Feelings
Since most people are on their best behavior on a first date and unsure of how long they can keep it up, first dates are a circus for chaotic feelings. If your gut feelings are fine-tuned (which may only take a few weeks with dedication), you will feel the true sense of who someone is instead of the chaos.
Glossing over gut feelings in the dating world is an epidemic. Because we want to go out or love what the other person brings to the table we tend to ignore negative gut feelings. The more you get to know someone you had an initial bad gut feeling about, the deeper you go into an unhealthy relationship. Remember, injuries to your self-esteem (mental and emotional well-being) are longer lasting than bruises. Unfortunately, I speak from experience.
As “Your Personal Safety Trainer, " one of my best safety tips for dating women to avoid dating nightmares is trust your gut feelings!
Bonus Safety Tip: Gut feelings are survival instincts you were born with and their job is to keep you alive. And now I would like to offer you free access to printed and audio versions of the “Seven Deadly Personal Safety Mistakes" plus 2 additional safety bonuses when you subscribe to my free weekly Safety Quick Tips; a 52 week newsletter on Personal Safety. You can get your instant access (and a sample Safety Quick Tip) at http://www.PersonalSafetyTrainer.com