How well are you taking care of yourself? Do you take time for yourself, or are there so many distractions in your life that you're last on the list of your busy schedule?
If we're not taking time for ourselves, it's difficult for us to be giving love to someone else because we run out of energy. If there's nothing left for us, there sure isn't going to be anything left for anyone else!
Getting to the root of why you're not taking time for yourself is the first step in changing your behavior. If we really value ourselves, we find the time to do what's important to us. But that can be challenging when we have so many other influences pulling on our time and energy. It can be easy to fall into self-sabotage.
Overcoming self-sabotaging habits is critical, so you can start investing your energy in creating the relationship of your dreams and living a life of love.
If it feels like you're stuck in some old habits and you're having a difficult time moving forward, take some time to work through the following:
1. Are you carrying any emotional baggage from the past? Are there patterns you keep repeating in your life or relationships? Is there something from your past that's still unresolved and keeping you stuck? Very often it can be hard to see these things for ourselves, but I've found journaling and meditation to be wonderful avenues to discovering what's still unresolved emotional baggage from the past. Working with a coach or energy therapist can also help bring these issues to light.
2. Do you have limiting beliefs or inner conflict around what you can actually create in your life? This can be huge. Often we are completely unaware of how we are limiting ourselves simply because we haven't thought about it. Do you really believe you deserve to have the life you desire? Or do all kinds of limiting beliefs rise to the surface when you think about it? Writing down these thoughts as they come up and looking at them on paper can help you get clear of what may be holding you back unconsciously.
3. Make your list of pros and cons about incorporating those great new habits you want into your life. Okay, this is the fun part. Write down all the reasons you want to change an old, bad habit and what will happen if you do. Then go back and write down what will happen if you don't. Usually if our “why" is big enough, we'll find the time and energy to invest in ourselves in a positive way. Whether that be incorporating a new exercise program, taking time to journal or meditate, or just eating better, when we really remember and focus our attention on how great we'll feel when we do the things to take care of ourselves, it's easier to start following through.
Overcoming self-sabotage can be challenging if we let our unresolved stuff from the past keep us stuck. But once you discover what was holding you back, you can move on to creating new and wonderful habits for yourself that will support you in living the life you desire and attracting the love of your life.
© 2008 Dawn Allen
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