How To Improve Communications With Those Who Were Difficult To Communicate With In The Past

Sonny Julius

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You talked but didn't get a response. You talked but you got a negative response. Has this happened to you often? All the time? Occasionally? Never? Well if you have experienced it more often then you care to admit then maybe it's time to find out why.

Good communications can be a pleasant experience. Bad communications can be a very unpleasant experience. When you are in conversation with someone else it's great to be able to “hit it off" with them. On the other hand if you get the “cold shoulder" from them or a stern rebuttal it might be your last chance to communicate with them again.

When this happens with a family member, dear friend or even a new acquaintness you may have “blown you chance" to ever enjoy their company again. Now, hopefully, this won't be quite this severe but you may have to “mend a lot of fences" before you have can enjoy their company once again.

What are some things that causes these kind of responses? To be blunt about the whole issue, you could be a “real blabber mouth". You could be one that dominates the conversation from the start. Instead of first asking questions of the individual and then listening to their response you may just jump in there with both feet and talk a mile a minute about your own interest.

Wow! was I guilty of that myself at one time. It was back during my sales career that a certain instant happened to finally wake me up to what I was doing wrong Let me first say, before I tell you my story, that I was a very aggressive salesman who wanted to be highly successful at my craft.

This particular incident happened one day when I was a sales supervisor whose job was to open up new territories for my company and then hire a salesman to finally manage it. My company had a new and unique way of selling their product and services and I was very excited about it.

So here I was in a distant city this day calling on a certain apartment community to sell maintenance supplies. My goal was always to make as many calls as I could in one day and add as many new customers as I could sign up. Once I arrived on the complex I spotted a man who I assumed was the maintenance supervisor hurrying down the sidewalk. I called out to him and he stopped.

Now here is the climax to this incident that day. I asked him if he was the maintenance man and he agreed he was. I then introduced myself and proceeded to make my lenghty presentation pointing out all the benefits of my services and products. When I finally finished the prospect looked at me with a very stern look on his face and said, " I don't have the authority to buy you'll have to talk to the manager" I said, “Why didn't you tell me that before I began my presentation. He said, " mister you talked so fast I couldn't get a word in at all.

Another sad part of this story was I was breaking in a new salesman. Not a very good lesson for someone just starting out with the company. In addition to that, I finally went to the manager to make my pitch to her without success. Even though I asked her questions before I started talking she wasn't a bit interested in changing vendors.

Since I'm a very positive thinking person, I didn't let that incident discourage me. In retrospect it probably was the best thing to happen. I learned a valuable lesson and so did the new salesman as well. After that I learned to first ask questions and then listen intensely to the response I get. Consequently my closing rate became much more successful.

If you have lost contact with a family member, a good friend or have had difficulty making new friends because of poor communication skills I hope the above story will help you solve your situation.

Sonny Julius is a retired sales supervisor. Prior to this he spent 29 years in the family florist business. Becoming dissatisfied he decided to enter the sales profession. After 18 months with the first sales company he left and joined another one and eventually spent 20 years with them. During this time he became a sales supervisor with a sales staff of eight salesmen with territories from the midwest to the west. His interest in the Internet eventually led him to search for a home-based business he felt worthy to promote. After being dissatisfied with a few he joined he eventually found the ideal one and now spends a few hours a day promoting it.


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