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It's So Hard to Be Me


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Be content with what you have;

rejoice in the way things are. . . Tao Te Ching, Lao-tzu, 44

How many times have we all told ourselves or informed our friends, therapists, spouses, ministers, total strangers, it's so hard to be me? We habitually repeat internal mantras like: My life seems to be so much harder than most everybody else's. It looks as if things are going so well for all those people out there. Why does my life have to be so difficult? I really try hard, and then look what I get for it. If only I were wealthier, better looking, slimmer, younger, taller, shorter. . .

To be sure, there is an enormous amount of real emotional pain that almost all of us experience. While we listen to our ego-driven mind telling us of the inevitability of pain, we remain unaware that there are simple solutions. We are the key. Everyone understands the “hard life" thought pattern:

  • I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired.
  • I've got being miserable down pat.
  • Just when I think I'm happy, something happens.
  • Life hurts.

These incessant mantras roll through our minds without our conscious participation. The illusions have enormous momentum, constantly feeding unresolved emotional pain, enabling it to thrive. This routine of nourishing emotional pain is obviously not in our best interests.

Internal unresolved emotional pain (trauma, energetic junk) is a common human condition, causing most of our living problems. Most of us acceptemotional pain as a necessary life ingredient. We are conditioned to somehow cope with it, to work around it, knuckle-under, stiff upper lip and all that.

The sole function of the ego is to continue to exist. The ego exists only in the world of form. Here's how our minds enable our egos. When asked who we are, we habitually identify ourselves as the story of the person that our mind tells us we are. To illustrate: I have variously described myself as a husband, father, grandfather, U. S. citizen, actor, singer, college graduate, pilot, Nam-vet, Caucasian, of Irish/German heritage and so forth (and that's just some of the good stuff). We all could go on for hours describing ourselves and never run out of descriptions. Try it! In reality, we never even come close to the magnificence of who we are.

These mind created identities keep us trapped in the bondage of our egos. We define ourselves as the sum total of all our experiences, all our thoughts, our stories, illusions, genetic codes, religion, politics, gender, marital status, *** orientation, career, etc. , etc. In reality, those descriptions actually perpetuate our slavery to form-based reality.

There are simple solutions to this “hard life" pain pattern. These do not involve the mind. Energetic problems require energetic solutions. Energy healing programs bring us awareness that we are Spirit. We are Beings, occupying this human form. The ego and mind find life only in the earth-bound human. They know nothing of Being. Spirit defines our essential nature, one that we share with all creation and beyond. . . Pure Awareness.

In Pure Awareness, the livin’ is easy.

For more than 30 years, Marty Murphy has studied the effects and healing of unresolved emotional pain. In 2005, Marty founded The Freedom Step ( ). TFS guides us to an experience of the joy of Pure Awareness. Each of us is Spirit; each a healer, here to wake up and heal ourselves and each other. Marty wrote The Mind Whisperer: The Freedom Step Out of Slavery to take readers deeper into the philosophy and workings of The Freedom Step program. Marty and Monita, his wife of 45 years, live in La Mesa, CA. Visit The Freedom Step site to learn more about energy healing of emotional pain.


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