Musings and Observations on Life

Jeff Herring

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It's difficult to know what you want in life until you know what is out there.

It's never too late to start and always too early to quit.

Daylight Savings Time: Fall back, Spring forward. Here's a challenge for you: Try explaining this whole process to a 6-year-old. “But Daddy, it IS time to get up because it's light outside!!"

Some folks look at marriage counseling as just a “chaperoned fight. " Nope. When it's done right, it's a way to become the best spouse you can be and have the best marriage you can.

No matter where you are in life, it's important to learn from where you have been and to plan for where you want to be.

The passing of comedian Steve Allen can remind us all that the best humor really is clean humor.

As the holiday gift-giving season approaches, I want to share an amazing discovery we made a few years ago. Christmas Day is the same date each and every year! Don't say you weren't warned.

Saying “I will try" is like saying I will do something differently until it becomes uncomfortable, and then I will change back.

The five most important words a parent can say: “I'm so proud of you. "

The five most important words a spouse can say: “Let's try it your way. "

The five most important words a child can say: “I love you thiiiiis much!"

Have you ever wished you could go back and do part of your life over because you don't like how things are now? We all have, of course. Then wouldn't it then make sense to live today so as to never have to feel that way a year from now, five years, 10 years, never again?

Be careful when you tell a young person “you have so much potential, " “you can do anything you set your mind to, " etc. What we mean as encouragement and a compliment can be heard and experienced as pressure.

One way to count your blessings during the holiday season is to remember the 90/10 rule. All of us have problems, but they usually fall in to the 10-percent category, while all the good stuff can be found in the 90-percent category. Yet we tend to focus all our thought, energy and attention on the 10 percent. Keep solving the problems, of course; just remember to keep your focus on the 90 percent this holiday season. Might be a good idea all year round.

Working with families can be a funny thing. Most parents are very willing to have their child see a counselor. Some parents say they would love to work on themselves too, but don't want to blow the “all-together parent" image and be a bad model. Seems to me that the best role models are those who can model working on improving themselves, too.

When you find yourself thinking the grass might be greener on the other side, remember this: It will still need mowing and might just be cement painted green.

Best quote I've seen since last time, from Karen Lamb: “A year from now you may wish you had started today. "

Visit for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.


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