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Do You Possess Your Life Or Endure It?

Joyce Shafer
 


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I read a line in a novel by P. D. James, “. . . preserving always the same look of puzzled acceptance of a life which had to be endured rather than possessed. " Many people probably feel this way these days; but they can feel another way, if they choose to.

In our most challenging moments you or I face, we tend to ask, “How did I get into this situation, " or “Why is this happening?" These are understandable questions, but they aren't necessarily helpful.

Every day, each of us endures something even if it's an inconvenience of lesser magnitude. Some people endure much more than most of us ever think about having to. When we find ourselves facing a challenge we believe we can do nothing about, we can still take possession of it. When we take possession of something, we generally take care of it or care for it; or, at least, that is the idea.

How many of us feel we are in possession of our lives? In order to feel this way, we have to also feel in possession of our thoughts, words, feelings, and actions. We have to possess or own the choices we've made and the outcomes they created. We have to decide if what we experience causes us to endure life or live what we desire.

There are things about our lives that only we can change. There are things we cannot change, so must find a way to come to terms with them. Whatever you feel challenged by at this time, find a way to take possession of it, even it it's just your attitude about it. To paraphrase Ernest Holmes, fear is misplaced faith; a belief in two powers instead of one.

Though I've had a lifetime of successes (depending on your definition of success), several years back, I clearly saw and felt something was missing. I could have taken the approach many do and learned and mimicked a lot of external actions to produce outcomes that would cause others to call me or my life a success. I could have done that, but I didn't. Instead . . .

I decided to expand my personal power, to see what I'm truly capable of, primarily from the spiritual perspective. I knew my path was going to cause many to shake their heads or feel frustrated with me. When challenges appeared I'd wonder if I should abandon this path and take the one more traveled. Then, I'd remind myself of my desired outcome and keep going, no matter what. T. S. Eliot said, “Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go. " However, I feel there is no “too far" in expanding personal power in connection with Spirit and the truth of how reality works.

There were times when my world seemed to be crashing down around me; but like the Tower card in the Tarot, the seeming destruction was so a new, sturdier, and more splendid structure could be created instead.

Here is the process I take myself through to feel peaceful, empowered, and free even in times of perceived chaos.

  • I acknowledge that where I am is where I am and allow it. I own my part in creating it. Resistance creates struggle; and if I'm using this process, I don't need more struggle, I need to shift it.

  • I acknowledge that maybe I can shift it today and maybe I can't shift it until “tomorrow, " but I can shift how I feel now. This is especially important to me since I know that like attracts like. If I allow myself to feel even a bit better (raise my energy), I allow for things to shift with greater ease. This may sound like New Age hype, but its importance is huge and its effects immediate.

  • I agree to be on my timetable and no one else's. This is my personal journey.

  • I remind myself that if I focus on the situation as it is, I sort of superglue it into my reality.
    Focus on my desired outcome shifts my energy, attracts more of what I want, and just feels better.

  • I ask Spirit to show me what to do, including how to open myself to feeling more of what I want to feel. “Show me what I need to do to feel (xyz), " is one of the best ways to kick this into high gear.

  • I look at which beliefs serve me and which ones don't. The foundation of every conflict is a belief. Some beliefs have been with us so long, we form an attachment to them, even though they're toxic. We may even call them “facts. " They have to go if we're going to make a real shift. They have to be replaced with beliefs that support desired feelings and outcomes. I've had to recognize that my beliefs are the stories I repeat to myself. I can choose my stories.

  • I find some measure of truth in a new belief statement because we can't fool ourselves. If we don't believe it, we cancel it out.

  • I choose to get out of being so much in my mind and more into my feelings. Our feelings give us honest information. How we act from there becomes a measure of our greater understanding about the bigger picture and our role in it.

  • I affirm there is a way and I will find it, that Spirit always assists me. There's a reason so many say to leave the how in the hands of Spirit: no one can do how better. I pay attention and take action as needed.

  • I focus on something else while I wait for the answer, solution, next step, or shift. It's coming to me; it always does. I know from experience to expect it.

    I am an ongoing process (so are you). I've learned to determine what is authentic for me even if it differs from what others may think or believe is the way things should be done, or is “how things are. " I experience how joyfully powerful and peaceful it is to take full responsibility for my thoughts and thought patterns.

    If you depend on external matters to feel peaceful and empowered, you've agreed to enslave yourself to the whims of externals; and, you will feel fairly powerless and often frustrated as a result.

    Life is to be possessed, not endured. We can choose between enslavement to externals or freedom through personal empowerment; but, they are inner experiences first. Which do you choose?

    Joyce Shafer, L. E. C. , is the 4P Power Coach (jls1422@yahoo.com). 4P Power Coaching is for those who wish to use a spiritual approach (and tools) in life and business through conscious use of Law of Attraction. Details, free newsletter, quiz, and more at http://www.freewebs.com/coach4lifebalance ~ Books, reviews, preview chapters at http://www.lulu.com - including Law of Attraction Alchemy, which includes 64 powerful affirmations - with a twist!

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