For instance, in most cases, dealing with an unexpected death due to heart attack, car accident, or murder is usually more difficult to handle than someone dying from a long-term illness. The reason is that with sudden deaths, there is not time for the mind to prepare and no expectation. Therefore, when a lost one dies unexpectedly, grieving is often associated with devastation. Then, if the person who passed was someone extremely close to you, then again, the grieving will be more intense.
When losing a loved one, consider the following survival tips to get through the stages of denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and finally, acceptance. Support - Make sure you are surrounded by a good support system. Whether friends or other family members, you need to know that you have people around who care and are there to listen. Often, finding a support group of other people in the same situation will provide you with a much-needed outlet. Expressions - You also need to let go by expressing the way in which you feel. This might be done by writing a journal specific to the loved one you lost, putting together a beautiful scrapbook of that individual's life, planning a special garden, having a star named after the individual, or even volunteering your time to an organization that this person loved or something connected with the death. Personal Care - Often, people who have lost a loved one will forget to eat, sleep, or bathe. Even if you have to force yourself, make sure you get enough food, sleep, and personal care. You want to stay away from using things to help numb the pain such as drugs or alcohol, which will actually make the feelings being dealt with worse. Feelings - When losing a loved one, you will have lots of people approach telling you how you should feel, what you should do, and so on. Take all of this with a grain of salt, knowing these individuals are merely trying to help. However, it is important to understand that you may not even know how you feel so if you laugh one minute and cry the next, it is perfectly fine. Good Planning - You need to know that you are going to be faced with special dates for that person such as birthday, anniversary, Christmas, and so on. Instead of giving little thought, realize these dates are approaching and plan for them. You will likely be faced with feelings of sadness and grief, which is fine. However, if you can go over the things you will say to people or try to work on ways you will respond, you will likely get through the occasions easier.
For more free resources, visit http://www.thecbtcoach.com Julia Sorensen is the author of “Overcoming Loss Stories and Activities to Help Children Transform Grief and Loss" Published by Jessica Kingsley Publishers:
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