Relational Coaching, Pillars for Success

Paul Davis

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Relational coaching is becoming increasingly popular with the onslaught of divorce, dating disasters, date rape, and lengthy relationships gone awry. Life is precious, timely, and costly. Therefore we must redeem the time, become self-aware, discover what we're really looking for, and generate solutions to overcome that which overwhelms us. Before diving in headfirst to fish the seven seas for a compatible catch, do a personal assessment and create an action plan. If you are already in a meaningful relationship and experiencing bumps along the way, seek an alliance with whom to partner to improve your existing relationship.

A relational coach can be most helpful. Here are the pillars for a good client / coach partnership to ensure results.

1. Select someone with whom you feel safe.

You don't want to be with someone who is judgmental, condescending, and rough around the edges. Choose someone with grace, tenderness, and tact in dealing with delicate personal matters.

2. Choose someone who can keep confidence.

Your private and personal matters are precisely that. You don't want someone blabbing their mouth about your business elsewhere after your coaching session. Not even a coach's spouse deserves to hear your personal life struggles. Select someone who knows how to keep their mouth shut, cover you wholeheartedly, and guard your personal life.

3. Find someone who can be your cheerleader.

I know it sounds a bit infantile perhaps, but you want someone who is energetic, positive, and passionate about you. Everybody needs a cheerleader, someone to affirm, and recognize them. You need that in a life coach, if you are not getting it elsewhere. And even if you have positive affirmation elsewhere, being praised by your relational coach will further improve and enhance your confidence, while making you larger than life. You deserve to feel good about yourself. Make sure your relational coach praises, affirms, and uplifts you.

4. Get a coach capable of empowering you.

Coaching isn't merely about gaining knowledge and insight. It's about being empowered and equipped so you can stand on your own two feet and tackle your daily challenges successfully. Get a coach that can empower you. Anybody can diagnose the problem and tell you what you shouldn't do. A coach should empower you to the extent that you feel powerful, resourceful, and capable. A successful coach / client interaction will impart that intangible juice of passion and personal power to propel you forward.

5. Find a coach who can challenge and engineer breakthroughs for you.

An excellent coach will gently challenge your limiting beliefs, enabling you to become increasingly self-aware and solid in your own identity and capability. Most coaches merely diagnose their clients problems, but never provide the prescription to overcome and transcend the problem.

You want a coach who has broken barriers in his own life and manifested an overcoming lifestyle. You cannot give what you don't have.

Find a coach who can kindly challenge you, while simultaneously engineering breakthroughs for you to go over and get through what you've been going through.

6. Find a coach who has a marvelous sense of humor and can disarm you.

When we deal with personal matters, which we have denied or evaded for a long time, it can be a bit overwhelming at first. A wonderful sense of humor and ability to laugh can be precisely what you need to break your present emotional stuck state. Get a coach who can disarm you, make you laugh, and enable you to be hopeful. A coach should impart far more than knowledge. An excellent coach will impart life, enable you to breathe, and believe.

7. Select a coach that is patient with your personal progress.

You don't want someone who rushes you faster than you are capable of going. Breakthroughs me according to our own personal processing. Only you can process yourself as you transcend the past and joyfully step into your future. Don't ever let anyone rush or mishandle you along the way. You need to move according to your own inner timetable. The best coaches can recognize the pace by which you process and practically implement that which you are learning in the coaching sessions. A perfect pace produces peace and rest within your own heart, which enables you to be more productive. Hurrying along beyond what you are capable of leads to a breakdown, which you don't want. A peaceful and patient coach will impart the same to you and generate a spirit of productivity naturally without excessive pressure.

Paul Davis is a life purpose coach (relational & professional), worldwide minister, and former fitness trainer.

Paul is a poet and author of several books including Breakthrough for a Broken Heart; Are You Ready for True Love; and Adultery 101. Paul is a popular keynote speaker, creative consultant, adventurer, mediator conquering conflict, liberator, and dream-maker.

Paul's compassion for people & passion to travel has taken him to over 50 countries of the world where he has had a tremendous impact. Paul has served in many war-torn, impoverished and tsunami stricken regions of the earth. His organization Dream-Maker Ministries is building dreams, breaking limitations and reviving nations.

Paul inspires, revives, awakens, impregnates with purpose, imparts the fire of desire, catapults people into a new level of self-awareness, facilitates destiny discovery and dream fulfillment.

Contact Paul to speak at your event or for life coaching: , 407-284-1705

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