Anger is a part of our lives, but is it a good part? What is accomplished when we are angry?
These are basic questions that have been asked by man since man began questioning himself – Anger is not a good emotion and controlling it will enable you to get more done and feel better.
Anger is a misplaced emotion, that when seen in a cool (rather than hot on the spot) environment, is nothing more than simple frustration expressed strongly.
When we are angry, our blood pressure rises, and our bodies become full of adrenaline. This is a function of the fight or flight reflex, but in this case, anger does nothing to help you either fight or flee.
It only destroys your immune system, enervates you, and distorts your judgment. So, how is anger managed?
There are 4 easy steps that should be followed in order.
You will see the anger melt away, and replaced by some logical and sensible thought, which needs no management, but will help you make necessary decisions instead.
Step 1. The Countdown
We have often been told to count to ten before reacting when we are angry. This system advises you to count down (backwards) from 20 to zero. Do it slowly, silently, and breathe deeply while you count backwards.
Step 2. Pre-Occupy Yourself.
Anger has, as we said, raised your blood pressure and there is adrenaline working its way into your muscles and other cells.
Pre-occupy yourself with something physical Running in place is good for an office. Run in place silently for at least 3 minutes if you can.
At the end of the running in place, you will be breathing hard, and exhaling many of the toxins the anger had created.
Step 3. The Calm Down Phase
After step 2, sit down and relax.
Breathe deeply, inhaling and exhaling with the following image.
When you inhale, imagine you are breathing in the calm and harmony from a running brook of water. It’s cool and soothing.
When you exhale see your breath as the exhaust from a car sending out the black smoke and soot from the fire of toxins that had recently been running amok in your body.
Step 4. Become a Philosopher
Repeat to yourself, “no need to get so excited…" and “let me look at what happened logically".
What you need to do is to examine the reason for your anger as if it was happening to a 3rd party and not you.
See the reasons for anger in that light, and not taking whatever happened so personally.
These four steps always work and never fail.
Your anger will subside, and you will begin to see that happened differently. If problems were created, you will begin to see some remedies.
If your anger is based on betrayal of any sort, you will begin to look at what happened, and attribute it differently, more rationally and logically, and certainly less egotistically.
As you cool off, you body will return to normal. It is good to remember that constant anger is seen as an anti-social trait, and a sign of personal weakness.
Learn to manage your anger and you keep yourself healthier, happier and more successful.
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