Wedding planning is hard! There are 20 billion details to deal with. You divvy up the list, you accomplish your part, your partner accomplishes his or her part and still there are a million details undone. It is so easy at this point in the planning to process to start holding a grudge for the infractions. This sets precedence that you don't want anywhere near your marriage. You don't want to spend time undoing the things you learned during the dash to the wedding.
And while I think it's basically a really good thing to have people to whom we can vent about our partners, it's really difficult for our friends to love the partner that we're incessantly complaining about. We need to have some respect for our beloveds. And we need to not wait to find our respect until we're in the middle of our wedding ceremony saying our wedding vows!
We always tell ourselves, ah, it's just for this time period. Nope. We're busy learning this is the way we do things while under stress. It's not a good thing. Why not try something else? Why not try another way? Every day, count the reasons your partner made your life better. And then recount them for your partner. It's heady and addictive stuff to have your partner tell you how well you pleased him or her today. You'll want to do more. And that will get everyone what he or she wants: A wedding that's beautifully planned and carried through on and two lovers who know how to talk to one another!
Spend time with one another counting the reasons you are blessed for your sweethearts’ participation in your life. That's constructive criticism that everyone wants to respond to! When you tell someone how good they are at something, they get better at it. And have some sense when you divvy up lists. Take talents and proclivities into consideration. People will not necessarily do things they said they would if they're completely against their nature. They CAN'T. And you don't want either of you to hate the wedding planning! Play nicely now and you'll get to play nicely for a very long time!
Bottom Line?: Give your relationship the chance it deserves to succeed wildly, against all odds! After all, you deserve it. Your relationship deserves it! And now I'd like to invite you to sign up to receive 2 free templates for creating the wedding ceremony of your dreams, the wedding vows of your heart and the marriage of a lifetime: http://annkeelerevans.org/weddings/free
The Rev. Ann Keeler Evans - helping you move from “I do" to happily and healthily ever after!