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When We Are Vulnerable, We Are Protected

Chandra Alexander

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We often associate being vulnerable with being afraid. There is a negative connotation to the word; as a result, most of us avoid this unguarded position at any cost. We tend to think of it as a liability or a handicap, but in truth, this exposure creates the opportunity for growth and, ultimately, peace.

Two years ago, I had three auto accidents in one year. None of them were my fault and no one was hurt, but they scared me just the same. The first one was a small bump in the supermarket parking lot as I was pulling out. I wondered why it had happened-the other car appeared to have come out of nowhere. The second time I was hit from behind as I waited at a light. And the third time, a car going about sixty ran a red light and hit the front of my Explorer, sending me careening off the road.

All of these “accidents" disturbed me. I simply could not dismiss them even though, legally, they were not my fault. I never thought of myself as a victim and innately knew that somehow I was part of the equation. I could feel a pattern building-each accident was more serious than the last; the universe kept upping the ante. I spent a year trying to figure out what was going on, and I came up with many explanations, but none of them gave me that feeling of resolution. I could feel the universe trying to teach me something, but I just couldn't get it.

Then, one day as I was driving along, not thinking of anything, it came to me-I had thought I would never have an auto accident. In my arrogance, I believed the things that happen to most people couldn't happen to me. I had deluded myself into thinking that my spirituality protected me and that moving through the world accident-free was my reward. In my desire to be special, I had mistakenly left my humanness behind and, in the process, become cut off from others.

Instantly, I understood the lesson-separateness leaves us unprotected, disconnected from the divine energy that runs through us all. What happens to one of us is a possibility for us all. Accepting our humanness, with all its imperfections, makes us vulnerable and once again connects us to the source. This is what protects us. Only this.

Chapter 44 from Reality Works- Let It Happen Copyright © 2002 Chandra Alexander

Chandra Alexander, MSW, has been living and teaching authenticity for the last thirty years. Selected by The Oprah Magazine as the Life Coach to deliver twelve coaching sessions to the grand prize winner of their Toyota Moving Forward contest, she also spent five years on NBC/TV/Daytime giving a weekly “Reality Check. " Her blog, is a real find for any true seeker on the path to authenticity. Along with a private practice in Tampa, FL, she coaches clients all over the world in the areas of relationships, work and consciousness. To learn more about her books and CDs, visit her website at


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