As men when it comes to women we will fall between two different categories. First is the Men who can attract women and at the bottom men who have no luck with women. Now all men filter there experiences with women the same three ways, even though there filters are on two different switches. Below I will explain the 3 filters and how each category of men sees it.
1. ) Delete- This occurs when we selectively pay attention to certain aspects of our experience and omit others.
Man Who Attracts- Remembers all his successes with women and has a hard time recalling any major setbacks or failures with women.
Man with No Luck- Dwells on always being shot down by women, recalls the one or two times he failed miserably with women and uses that as proof of his unlucky ways. Hardly ever remembers getting lucky with women and even if he does knows how he messed it up at the end.
2. ) Distort- The process that allows us to make shifts in our experience of sensory data by making misrepresentations of reality.
Man Who Attracts- After a date or going out with a woman will believe more often than not that she had a great time and will recall specific moments either real or imagined in which he was being successful with her.
Man With No Luck- Will take obvious signs that she is interested and twist them around or misinterpret them to mean something else, ironically he usually turns signs of disinterest to mean good things and will choose those moments to make big time moves which usually result in big time failures for him.
3. ) Generalize- The process of drawing a global conclusion based on only one or two examples of an experience.
Man Who Attracts- If at a bar or club approaches 10 women only 2 of them show him signs of interest and gets only 1 phone number. Yet goes home thinking he was on fire and all the girls at the club wanted him, in fact he had to turn many of them away just to get at the couple of chicks he really wanted.
Man With No Luck- If at a bar or club maybe approaches 1 or 2 women gets shot down cant figure out what he is doing wrong, sees hot chick inviting him over with her smile and eyes and doesn't go over because he is tired of getting shot down waits an hour and a couple of beers and shots to build up his courage sees hot chick again dancing with her friends goes over and gets shot down again only this time because he waited too long and was stammering drunk.
If you think you are a man with no luck with women realize that it's all in your mind. Now it might not happen overnight however if you consciously make an effort to switch your reality filter to that of a Man who Attracts Women you just might find yourself living The Man Who Attracts Women reality as well
Teddy Shabba is a Dating Coach for Men and creator of Dating Advice and Tips for Men which provides an abundance of information for men on dating and more