When your partner breaks up with you, it's easy to go into panic mode. Desperate not to lose your ex for good, you can sometimes freak out and do things that seem like the right idea at the time but you quickly learn will cost you a lot. . . perhaps even your whole shot at getting your ex back at all!
Here's a brief list of the 4 biggest “Reconciliation Oopses:"
- Don't shower your ex with attention. It may seem like it's your only chance when you're desperate to make your ex understand how much you care, but it's Number One on the Do Not Do list. For you to have any chance at all, your ex will need some time to miss you and YOU will need some time to formulate a game plan for getting him or her back. Trust me on this, give it about a month where you don't talk at all, unless circumstances make it flat-out rude not to.
- Don't panic if you find out your ex is with other people. 90% of rebound relationships don't last, and in all honesty you should be up and out there sampling from the dating pool as well. It's actually a good thing that your ex is dating again, it'll give him or her a chance to remember just how great it was being with you. The good times will become more idealized and the bad ones will seem less important. This is great for actually helping your ex to miss you, and therefore want you back.
- Don't let life pass you by as you wilt from the depression and breakup pain. Your ex is probably out there trying to move on, why shouldn't you be? Staying active and being social is a great way to speed up the emotional healing, and even if all you're doing is putting on a happy face and forcing a good time it still counts. Soon, the pain will start to fade and you'll be able to think clearly. . . not to mention if your ex happens to hear about “how well you're doing without him (her), " it'll spark new interest as well.
- Don't lie to yourself and tell yourself things like “I'll never find another person like my ex" or “My ex was my one true shot at happiness. " Just statistically speaking, that's absolute nonsense. There are lots of other people in the world, and more than one is capable of understanding you and making you happy. In fact, considering you two broke up, there's probably somebody out there somewhere a lot better for you than your ex. I'm not saying you shouldn't try to win back your ex if that's what you want to do, but you shouldn't fool yourself into believing that if it doesn't work out your life is over.
I'm not saying this is all you'll ever need to know about avoiding critical mistakes when trying to get your ex back, or just about getting your ex back in general, but this is a great start for you to develop the right mindset. Although sometimes a bit counter-intuitive, the process of healing your breakup pain and getting your ex back can be relatively simple if you just know what to do and what not to do.
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