Are you like millions of other people who've endured the frustration of relationship breakdown? Perhaps you're disillusioned with love because relationship after relationship never lasts. Here are 5 reasons as to why many relationships breakdown to help you form lasting, happier unions.
Effective communication between lovers is a cornerstone of every successful relationship. Communicating wants and needs clearly to each other reduces misunderstandings and confusion and brings clarity. But many people have a somewhat silly notion that their partners “should automatically know what I want" and get frustrated and angry when their partner doesn't deliver. OK, as much as you wish, people are not telepathic mind readers and expecting them to be is unrealistic. So let each other know your wants and needs clearly and in a non-demanding way and watch your relationship grow stronger.
Respect for each other is absolutely fundamental. This means accepting and loving your partner for the wonderful, unique human being they are. However, many people actually believe they “own" their partner, and expect them to conform in ways they deem appropriate. This is more like slavery than love! Your partner isn't your private property, they certainly aren't your slave and it isn't conducive to a happy relationship to restrict their freedoms by treating them this way. Your partner may want to grow in ways you may not like or even feel comfortable with but preventing their growth not only stifles them but you as well. Because your partner will treat you in the same way. Instead of restricting each other's freedoms, it is far better encourage your partner to grow and become the person they want to be. Indeed, this is the only way true love can flourish.
The blame game is another effective way to drive a wedge between you and your partner. The blame game is played by people who seize upon the slightest of mistakes and lay into their partner over it. We live in a blame culture these days but in relationships it has no place. Another way the blame game is played is when you do something wrong and then find a way to blame your partner. “That wouldn't have happened if it hadn't have been for you talking to me" is a prime example. No one wants to be told they are continually at fault and love can't blossom between two people who play the blame game with each other. Far better is to work together and accept joint responsibility and try to solve problems and issues for the benefit of the relationship instead of scoring points over each other.
Without doubt, the single worst way to spoil your relationship is to be argumentative because you need to be right. This is DEADLY. Argumentative people will argue to the nth degree until they “win" about everything and anything. They will not listen and consider their partner's viewpoints and will rarely if ever compromise. Any criticism, even if fair and justified will be met with defensive and sometimes angry responses as the need to be right overrides the need to compromise and improve the relationship. Try not to get into silly, futile arguments and remember that winning arguments isn't the objective, but what is best for your relationship - if you want it to last.
Keeping the spark alive in a relationship is something many couples fail to do. Contentment sets in, you start to take your partner for granted and gradually, the spark fades and dies. It's so easy to fall into the contentment trap and the result is you stop making an effort for your partner. Your appearance changes, you don't go out as much, and lots of other activities you used to do have been ditched. The mystery has gone, the challenge has gone, the spark just isn't there! Keep it alive by making the effort to do new things, to enjoy new adventures and remember to do things separate from each other as well as with each other and you'll reap the rewards.
Put this knowledge to work for your relationship and both you and your partner will enjoy greater happiness.
To discover more articles, tips and information to help you improve your relationship check out the Transform Your Love Life website.