How Do Nice Guys Get Confidence for Approaching Women


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We all pretty much know that women like men who are ‘confident’. What else do they mean when they say that?

They want a man who is ‘comfortable in his own skin’.

So what happens in reality? You should probably already know.

A guy sees a beautiful woman and all of a sudden his own body language changes.

He becomes UNcomfortable in his own skin in her presence.

The woman can't be interested because this man clearly doesn't appear to be confident. And if the man decides to approach her, she has already made up his mind about him; he's NOT comfortable in his own skin in relation to her and that's what matters the most.

How can she be interested in him at all or allow things to develop to a physical or dating phase if she herself is nervous around him?!

Try as hard as they can by learning pick-up lines or breathing exercises, most of these men just can't ‘act’ confident around these beautiful women.

There's just no denying the fact (in his mind) that she is very desirable and beautiful. He's spent too much time edifying and adding value to everything she represents so he portrays nervousness around her.

No amount of body language techniques can help him because he is still ‘acting’.

For a nice guy to actually gain confidence around beautiful women (who know the truth of what he generally represents), it's going to take more than a band-aid solution.

Women are very intuitive and if a man is incongruent and shifty in his nonverbal body language when he's around her, she is not able to trust him to be himself.

When she can't trust him she will obviously not want to open up to him. If he's behaving like a smitten response around her, how can she trust him to lead her in the bedroom?

This is the kind of guy that will keep draining her energy and that she might never be able to get rid of.

Women want a man who is confident and independent. A man who doesn't have any issues around her. A man she can trust who she can open up and be attracted to.

The real fix for millions of men is not in learning pick-up lines, buying gifts or further edifying the woman (yikes!); the real fix is in becoming comfortable in his own skin in relation to the power and beauty these women represent.

Once he can truly BE that man, he can exude his natural character and even if he's just average in personality, she'll be more interested in him than other guys who are trying to ‘win’ her affection or are nervous around her.

In fact, if men would just be truly comfortable in their own skin around the most beautiful women before, during and after their interaction with them, that would be the most effective thing they could do for their dating life.

All they would have to do is make connections and women will help them out because they've finally met a man who has this important quality.

Once a man is confident and a woman can trust him to BE who he is, THEN she can respond to him and find out more about those personality traits.

This is where it all begins and it's unfortunate that so many guys keep looking for the surface level band-aid solution when it's a much deeper problem.

No amount of ‘inner game’ fixing, hypnosis, or NLP is going to help most men reach a level of independence in relation to the greatly exploited and leveraged powers that these women represent.

The answer for these men to really have personal power and lack of insecurities is to fix the root of the problem itself.

Of course it helps to have *** experience as this will help boost a man's confidence, but what about those men who just don't have this to begin with?! I talk about this more in a different article.

A man has too work on the root of his behavioral problem in the first place.

By understanding not his own self-limiting beliefs, but instead understanding the root behavioral characteristics that women represent and his relationship to them, a man will finally have true power.

Men today live in ignorance of a great power game that is being played and women are carrying these attributes which are blinding to men.

It's not enough to fix his own inner self because he'll still be ignorant. The true solution is in aligning himself to cognition and the reality of relational dynamics.

When he can know his place in relation to the great and consciously developed relationships that exist, then he will be able to see clearly and differentiate himself from it.

He will have power and retain his power before his relationship with any powerful woman. Because THAT is the point where she knows he has confidence. If he has to prove it or determine higher value and break her value down, then he doesn't have it.

It's time for men to be equal or greater in relational power than women so that women can have what they're looking for.

-Rion Williams

Rion Williams is one of the foremost experts in dating advice, personal power and relational dynamics. He is well-known within the seduction community itself.

His work focuses on the regaining and improving of real character within frustrated men who do don't want to ‘act', use pick-up lines or techniques to get women.

He teaches modern men how to truly be natural and comfortable in their own skin to consistently succeed with women, attraction and dating. You can sign up for his free eZines and find out more information at

He also has a free podcast at


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