Shyness is sometimes referred to as a social phobia and it affects the majority of the population at some period in their lives, however teenagers are particularly vulnerable to it. Shyness tends to be rooted in feelings of self-consciousness, which are particularly common when a person is in the process of developing social skills and building self-confidence.
Sometimes the concept of overcoming shyness puts too much pressure on an individual and they should instead focus on feeling at ease and confident in a variety of social settings. Although most teenagers do outgrow a sense of shyness, the vestiges of it sometimes prevail into adulthood.
Overcoming shyness is about putting yourself out there and not letting shyness rule the day. Take note of what situations cause you to feel shy and then resolve to approach these situations differently the next time you find yourself in them. For example, if you feel shy when you are at a party or social gathering and are introduced to new people then try something different. For example, next time this happens, put your most self-confident foot forward and be as outgoing as possible. Do this by smiling, asking a question worthy of the occasion, offering the new person your hand or making and maintaining eye contact for a few seconds.
Watch how other individuals handle themselves in social situations. People who have mastered the art of socializing know how to put other people at ease. They are fun to be around, they are interesting, they are full of conversation and humor and they make others feel comfortable and good about themselves. Who wouldn't want to be around someone like that? Overcoming shyness is about being honestly interested in the people in your company.
Pay attention to others when you are engaged in a conversation, concentrate on what they are saying, and respond accordingly. Learning to be an excellent listener goes a long way as well. By honing these basis social techniques and putting the focus on others instead of yourself, you are paving the way to overcoming shyness. When you focus on other people or the situation at hand, even things like how much you are enjoying the social event, the music, the food, etc. then you are less likely to focus on your fears and insecurities.
Another way to take the emphasis off of yourself and put it on those you are in the company of is to not start all of your sentences with the pronoun, “I. " Yes, you must say it sometimes but in order to defuse a stressful social situation, overcoming shyness means not drawing more attention to yourself.
Realize that there will be times that no matter what you do, shyness will rule the day. Also, be aware that social foibles will take place and that is true for the most self-confident individual down to the shyest individual. Just recognize the fact that mistakes can be turned into learning experiences and you will survive the embarrassing “red faced" moments of life.
Overcoming shyness is a process that like everything else in life, takes time. It will not be easy to overcome shyness but with effort, practice, hard work and plenty of courage, you can rid yourself of shyness eventually. Whatever you do, do not give up on yourself.
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