There are words that you just can't say around children. The reasons for the censorship differ.
Of course there are the standard ‘bad’ words that no one wants their children to hear - the main reason for that is that we don't want our kids repeating those nasty words. Swearing in general doesn't sound nice but it's a kazillion times worse coming from a 3 year old.
Then some families also have a hot list of words that aren't ‘bad’ in the same sense. They are every day words that there is really nothing wrong with but that people prefer their kids don't use.
Our hot list has a lot of insult words on it. Things like stupid, idiot, moron. I explained to the kids that those words really have no use other than to say something mean to or about someone and therefore they have no place in our home.
This has caused a little confusion now and again. Like the day that my sister used the “S word" (Stupid) and Pie gasped in horror and hissed that Auntie had said a bad word! Auntie was not particularly amused since this initiated an interesting conversation between her and her children!
But that's life, not everyone does things the same way and sometimes we have to explain things to the kids that you wouldn't imagine explaining. . . but for me, having this hot list works.
When intense kids get angry, they get intensely angry. . . everything seems terribly out of proportion. Things that other kids wouldn't even notice can trigger an outrageous outburst in an intense child. To make matters that much more difficult, my intense kids will use any and every tool available to them to express their anger - that includes name calling and verbal assaults. Having this list of unacceptable words helps to curb the sting - they have to think a little harder and be a little more creatively to be nasty!
We also have a few other words that are off limits and spell only words. Rain, thunder and bath are among them.
The girl will go into a frenzied routine at the mere mention of rain or thunder but Bath? Well, maybe not what you imagine.
While some parents are in an never ending search for new kids bath products to entice their kids into the bathtub - I have to avoid the word unless I plan on producing a bath or the Girl will go crazy trying to have one NOW. She's very VERY persistent and it can be crazy making to listen to her go on and on and on and ON trying to get what she wants.
One day, my creative little angel (The Girl) came and showed me her dirty feet in an effort to invoke bath time. I suggested she could have one before bed and that her feet were ok, not that dirty. She trotted off and I went back to what I was doing only to find her standing in front of me a minute later with large clumps of garden spread evenly on her toes. It was all I could do not to praise her creativity and sharp mind in coming up with the plan - she is only 3 - but instead I suggested she stay out of the garden and gave her a cloth to clean her feet.
Parenting Challenging Children
L. Campbell is the mother of 3 children.
Dervish is the intense kid who inspired the site http://www.myrollercoasterkid.com He is a 7 year old whirlwind, an amazing athlete, inspired artist, funny, intuitive and also spirited, challenging, difficult and INTENSE. He can be exhausting to parent but also brings great joy to life.
The Girl is his 3 year old sister who mirrors his personalitiy and temperament exactly.
The Pie is the 11 year old big brother to these two. His temperament is easy going and friendly. . . sometimes it seems like he's a victim of the other two because they take so much energy - it's a challenge to keep him from sinking.
Myrollercoasrterkid.com offers advice and personal stories from the blog about life with these children. Trials and tribulations and the rewards and joy in life.