The Ugliest Christmas Tree

John Mehrmann

Visitors: 76

A long road before me, on I81
A long week behind me, when Friday is done

The highway that takes me to friends near and far,
The highway, my driveway, at home in my car

My house is still hours away in the gloom
My house, it stands empty, no light in the room

The neighborhoods glisten with twinkling lights
The neighbors all listen to carols tonight

And still, I keep driving in silence towards home
And still, I keep thinking of Christmas alone

My friends and their families, children’s faces aglow
My friends have decorated trees with presents below

I think of little faces, big eyes and bright smiles
I remember the excitement I have not seen in a while

I love those little children, their families, my friends
I love to think of them when Christmas begins

I decided, right then, with those thoughts in my mind
I decided a tree was what I must find

Some trees would have homes, ornaments and lights
Some trees would be lonely, no family tonight

I started my search for the ugliest tree
The one no one wanted would come home with me

I turned off the highway and into the lot
My heart raced with excitement that once was forgot

I ran to the steward of the large majestic pine
And described the tree that soon would be mine

“You don’t want that tree, ” rebuked the young lad
Then he proceeded to show me the best that he had

“This tree is noble, it’s full and it’s green”
“You better get it quick, before it is seen”

I shook my head, before I turned away
Someone sacked it and packed it, and started to pay

“I don’t think that you heard me, ” I told the young man
“I want an ugly tree. Do you understand?”

“We don’t have such a tree, ” the boy reprimanded
“Our trees are perfect, the ugly ones are stranded”

I hoped back in my car, undaunted at best
I could tell this adventure would put me to the test

At the next stop, I encountered a more severe fate
Reprimanded by the manager, a young man and his date

At the third stop, the salesman, told me with a grin
“The ugly trees were disposed of and thrown in that bin”

At the fourth try, the sales man said, “don’t call me lazy”
“But I’m not going searching for man who’s half crazy”

The fifth and the sixth stops results were the same
They showed me their best trees, claimed my quest was insane

They all tried to tell why their trees were the best
The tree that I wanted was not like the rest

Some thought I was looking for a discounted tree,
But price was no objection, for a companion ugly

My anticipation waned, my enthusiasm guarded
In hopes to find an ugly tree that had not been discarded

On my seventh attempt, fiercely stuck to my plan
I was greeted by a patient and elderly man

He listened, he smiled and nodded his head
“I have just what your looking for, ” was all that he said

We walked through a forest of wide trees and tall,
We walked to a corner, away from them all

And there in the darkness, laid flat on the ground
Was the ugliest tree that this man had found

“No charge, ” he said, “for a tree gnarled and twisted”
“I will pay for my tree, it’s great, ” I insisted

“Wait here, ” he exclaimed, “it’s your day my son!”
He came back with another, even uglier one.

Then we strapped them both to the top of my car,
We wrapped them in blankets, for the ride was still far

And then to my home, where they stood side by side
Decorated, and beautiful, and lit up with pride

I awoke Christmas morning with the fresh smell of pine
A gift from the trees, now companions of mine

In the glow of the fireside, we three reminisced
Of my childhood, of Christmas, and people we missed

How happy I was with my fine company
How happy they were to have a family

We listened to carols, drank cocoa, and smiled
We gave thanks to the day, celebrating a child

The old year was ending, a good one well done
My companions, reminders, Christmas is for everyone

- Bill “Big Dog" Billups - Friend, Mentor, VIP Sales Guru


Words of Wisdom

"A good conscience is a continual Christmas. " - Benjamin Franklin

"At Christmas play and make good cheer, For Christmas comes but once a year. " - Thomas Tusser

"At Christmas I no more desire a rose Than wish a snow in May's new-fangled mirth; But like of each thing that in season grows. " - William Shakespeare


John Mehrmann is a freelance writer and President of Executive Blueprints Inc. , an organization devoted to improving business practices and developing human capital. provides resource materials for trainers, sample Case Studies, educational articles and references to local affiliates for consulting and executive coaching. provides self-paced tutorials for personal development and tools for trainers. Presentation materials, reference guides and exercises are available for continuous development.

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