Let's be honest: colon cleansing can be a pretty funny ordeal. Check out the following hilarious testimonies from people who have learned about colon cleansing firsthand.
1. “Well, I have been on the plan for 8 days and feel better than I have in years. I can never remember feeling empty like this after a bowel movement. I have gone to the bathroom everyday except the first, and most days I have gone 2 or more times. There has been some mild cramping, mild bloating before first bowel movement and some reactions to spicy food (that may actually have something to do with my steeping time). "
Good to know that an empty feeling AFTER a bowel movement is good…and you might want to stay away from those spicy foods, darling.
2. “I was diagnosed with IBS 9 yrs ago after a bout with chronic pancreatitis. I became used to the bloating, the pain in my left side, the foul smelling diarrhea. On days that I would have a solid bm, it would be thin, sometimes pencil like. So you can guess my excitement, when 36 hrs after starting the program, I had a large bm. I could actually feel my colon emptying. It’s hard to explain but I could feel my stomach flattening. "
Are there really grown adults who still use the term “BM"?
3. “After the month of colon cleansing was over, I felt more energized than ever. There were a couple of days where I eliminated a bunch of toxins and mucoid plaque (rubbery stuff). I didn't want to look at it, I just flushed it down the toilet haha. "
At least this person can see the humor of their own creepy, rubbery stools.
4. " Being a male in this culture puts a really big stigma on enemas or any object going where the sun doesn’t shine. As a good looking straight man I have to say, enema’s rock!!"
I don't know that I, personally, would use that adjective to describe an enema, but I'm glad this enema participant was happy with his results.
5. " I consider myself a pooh expert. It all started when I raised two little poohs. I cleaned up a lot of pooh. I know what healthy pooh should look and smell like in a young non-contaminated little human. I have also cleaned big people pooh many times over. I have dealt with a lot of pooh in my days. I can remember being 4 years old and my brothers and I had white large worms coming out of us. Yuck! I also remember my kids and I having the pinworms. So folks, you can have worms! I was just watching a learning channel the other night that stated, ‘4 out of 5 Americans have a parasite!’ Yuck again!"
Um…I thought I was the only poop expert.
I hope this gave you the giggles! See, even colon cleaning can be funny!