The Payoff in the Process
“The true value in becoming a millionaire is not the money. It’s in who you become in the process. ” - Mark Richardson
Life is a process. Success is a process.
When I was 6 years old my Father took the training wheels off my bicycle in the Church parking lot across the street from our house. For the next 6 nights he walked alongside my bike to steady my balance, and on occasion would let me ride on my own. . I would ususally go a few feet and then fall. The fear of falling and hurting myself was offset by my desire to ride a bike like the bigger kids in the neighborhood. I could see the joy and freedom of riding on their faces. I wanted that. I wanted it bad. The freedom kept me going despite the fear Then it happened. One day I was pedaling along and glanced over my shoulder to where my Dad was walking. As I looked back he wasn’t there. I could see him at other end of the parking lot way behind me. In that instant I was a bike rider. Freedom and joy were mine.
This was a breakthrough for me, and with it came tremendous confidence. I would always remember how to do it. It was a process I had to go through to become a rider. The same applies to the process of prospecting. Falling down, getting up, asking for help, and emotionally balancing yourself on your own. After you have paid the price, faced the fear, you earn your breakthrough. Then everything gets easy, even effortless. Making money – easy. Talking to people – easy. Results – easy. Unquestioned confidence and self respect. The freedom and joy you feel - like riding a bike for the first time. Then comes an unexpected joy - the fulfilment you receive when you run alongside someone else and help them learn to ride. That’s the payoff if you are willing to go through the process.
The Good, The Bad, The Ugly Process
There is good news and bad news about the process of building your own business and in learning to prospect. The bad news is all your personal issues will come up. The good news is all your personal issues will comes up. It’s a gift if you take on the lessons, a curse if you don’t. These issues will likely include the fear of rejection, the fear of failure, money issues, people issues, low self esteem issues, and the fear of what your friends will think. The great news is that if you enter into the process of growth and development not only will all these fears (illusions after all) evaporate but all your qualities and strengths will surface, and with it the opportunity for you to be your best. The best word to describe it is empowerment. Not only will you get more out of life by removing the fears, the money will flow in effortlessly because of who you become. It’s all about your willingness to grow, and enter the “process”. On the other hand some people you enroll will quit building their business because they won’t want to face their issues, and to justify their decision will find something or someone to blame. This will often include blaming you for their failure (As the church lady from Saturday Night Live would say: “Now, isn’t that special?”).
The Process In The Process
Within the bigger “processes” are the smaller ones which include: the process of learning to invite, the process of becoming a prospector , the process of overcoming the fear of rejection and failure, the process of becoming a leader, the process of becoming a speaker, a trainer, etc. Knowing it’s a process, and accepting it, you can begin to “break it down” (dissect it) and accelerate yourself to success. In this book we will be breaking it down together.
A woman new to my business called me and said “Maybe I made a mistake doing this business. I don’t know that many people, and I’m afraid of inviting the ones I do know”. My response was “That’s great! You’re right on track”. “What do you mean?”, she replied with surprise. “What you’re experiencing almost everyone goes through. It’s part of the process. So the question is: Do you want to grow past your fears to success, or do you want to live with them the rest of your life?”. She stayed.
For me prospecting and recruiting is in reality the easiest thing in the world, but human nature tends to make it hard. It is as easy as saying to people: “Is there something in your life you would like financially?" Simple. So what specifically in humans makes it hard? Low self-esteem, fear of rejection, undeservedness, perfectionism, and any other form of self absorption.
PATIENCE IN THE PROCESS
I can only tell you that the payoff is worth the process I went through. More than the money it is the sense of self you gain in all areas of life. Everything gets better. What will deter you from the process will be an inability to believe in yourself and patience with yourself as you go into the process. No matter what age you begin the process at be kind, patient, and forgiving of yourself. Allow for time and love yourself for the courage to proceed. The lessons will come from all angles, so be patient.
How To Stay In The Process When The going Gets Tough
As in my bike example the willingness to continue despite the fears and frustrations only comes from someone who has a “why” big enough to persist. I remember a man who came to me for coaching a few years ago. He was an emotional basket case, and my inner mind said “There is no way this guy is ever going to make it”. What I didn’t know was he had no where else to go, and he had a big why behind his fears. Two years later he became a leader, with a 6 figure income to show. I was shocked when I saw the transformation. It inspired me. If he could transform that big why couldn’t I? So I went home and created some bigger whys on paper, some stronger passions. Get yourself a big enough why to stay in the game. Even if you don’t have a burning desire get one, create one. It’s the difference between a passionate life and one of stagnancy.
TIP: When you feel like quitting, or you are emotionally frustrated and dissapointed, tell yourself you are “right on track”. I know it won’t feel like it, but you are. It’s a process. Take a step back from activity and reread your dream list or goals. Read a section of the classic book Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill and allow yourself to recharge yourself. You’ll bounce back.
How To Go Through The Process Faster, To Get The Gold Faster
A way to stay in the process, and move through it faster to where the income and freedom wait, is to find a coach who has been through the process. This can also include books and tapes, but a good coach can ideally tell you exactly where you are in your process. There are so many things to learn about people and yourself in the process that an outside voice (find one who has been through the process already) will get you through it faster. Acknowledgement of the lessons as you get them (and trust me you will) will take you to the next step. The freedom that comes from even small successes and the confidence it brings will allow you to gather steam and go through the process even faster. You may even grow to enjoy it as I do. Understanding the process will also allow you to inspire and develop others faster, accelerating your income and your worth to your Company. For now I would be honored to serve as your coach through this book (you can also go to www.idealcoach.com).
INSTANT SUCCESS, WITHOUT THE PROCESS
Have you ever seen a person just step up and everything falls into their lap? The right people, success and money come easy? You must understand that everyone has to pay the price somewhere, and that “instant-success’ person paid the price somewhere else. Often they went through hardships earlier in life that developed their character and persistance. Maybe their parents were functional and developed their self esteem (now there is a rare thing, huh?). Don’t be discouraged. It is not a race, it’s a marathon. Just learn your skills, work through your process and collect what you deserve. Never mind about the instant success. It wasn’t.
If The Process Stops You
Believe it or not the process is there to serve you. It is there to expose the false self that holds you back from your greatness. Oddly enough the false self (ego, self image) does not want you to succeed. Like any person it wants to survive and if you change or alter your identity it will die (in its belief). It will fight you not to change, even if money is right in front of you it will sabotage you. That’s why people fall apart after winning the lottery. Their ego can’t handle the changes. You make the choice to go back to your job, or give up on your dreams because your ego has you and it gets too uncomfortable. If the process scares it enough to make you stop, ego wins. Your greatness and freedom are left behind.
The weird thing for me is that having made a lot of changes and having gained success it is as though I am conditioned for growth. For many people the idea of change and growth is the last thing they want. Just give me a steady job, 9-5, beer and Jerry Springer every night. They will tell you they want more but they don’t want to change or grow. After you taste some of the freedom and fulfillment through the process you get bored if you are not growing. At least I do .
Blessings In Your Process
Mark Richardson is a free man. He has built businessess and owns his own time. One of his businesses is http://www.airpodcleaner.com